Date: 08.03.2012
From: Peter
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Subject: so low
Hi everyone. Im so low at the mo, i just need to tell somebody how i feel.
I hate not working and i have not worked for months now. i cant go back to my previous job because it is too physically labouring.
Only recently been diagnosed and still trying to come to terms with it.
I am very irratable and seem to take things out on the people closes to me.Me and my wife are really not been getting well i feel like she doesnt understand how i feel.
We have not even been married for two years and i feel we are drifting apart.
I have never been this low before, could it be my meds making me so depressed?
I have applied for a few jobs and got a no from them both and i think it was because i was honest about the arthritis.
We are so tight for money and there is nothing i can do about it.
I assume there are alot of people who have or still do feel like i am feeling at the mo has anyone got any suggestions to what may lift my mood and maybe stop my marriage falling apart.
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Date: 08.03.2012
From: rhona
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Subject: Re: so low
Hi Peter,
I am so sorry to hear that you feel so low at the moment, can i just say it is quite normal to feel the way you do when you have recently been diagnosed, it takes time to come to terms with it. When i was first diagnosed i cried all the time and i really felt that my life had ended but please believe me when i say you will feel better, The main thing at the moment is getting you to feel better and that won't happen until your medications starts working. I would speak to your doctor Peter and tell him how you feel and he can maybe give you something to help your depression if it doesn't lift soon. Try and explain to your wife how you feel, don't close her out, if she knows the way you feel she can then try and help you. When you have been used to working it is hard to accept when you are not but again when you feel better it will be much easier to get work, you could ask at your job centre for advise and even on courses that may be available, also find out about any benefits that you may be entitled to. Try and spend some quality time with your wife, it doesn't always have to cost money to do things together, even going for a walk together and if you can swim then that is good for your joints and also lifting your mood. I hope things work out well for you take care x
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Date: 08.03.2012
From: bsk
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Subject: Re: so low
Like Rhona, I felt very bad when I was first diagnosed and I echo everything she has said. It is tough and it takes time for family and friends to get their heads around it too. Do ask for help as there is stuff out there to support you and it's important your gp knows how you feel. Have you tried ringing any of the helplines? Arthritis Care has one as does National Rheumatoid Arthritis Soc. I don't know what kind of arthritis you have but first one covers all types. They really know their stuff and can point you in the right direction to get more support. I wish you well and do keep in touch on here.
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Date: 12.03.2012
From: Paula
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Subject: Re: so low
Hi Peter,
I really feel for you, I was only diagnosed in the last few months and I felt really low about it. You are in shock, and so is your wife and family. It will take some time to get your head around it, I battle bipolar on top of the RA and either condition is setting off the other. The NRAS are really good and they can help your wife as well, it is important that both of you get the help you need, and it is vital you get some support to deal with how you are feeling about everything. Could your GP arrange some counseeling for you, and be honest to the GP about how you feel. I am sending you my thoughts, you will get to grips with it, and so will your wife. All she wants is a hug too, and wants you to talk to her. Hang in there. xx
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