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Date: 05.10.2009
From: val h :-)

Subject: packing

hi knew packing to go away would cause problems so did it sunday am. so could go back to bed for couple of hours. but now 1.45 am monday and can not sleep hoping pain meds kick in soon as joints feel red hot and as if they screaming at me with the pain could not find comfy position so have got up for a bit but need sleep so bad could sit and cry so glad did not leave it till during week when have work to cope with as well. mind u joints should still be bad for visit to hospital if how they feel now is anything to go by. if any one else out there in pain heres a (((hug))) for u take care sleep well
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: shaz :0)

Subject: Re: packing

hi val sorry you in so much pain right now and having sleepless nights, but same as you say in one way it might be helpful for you when you see rheumy tomorrow then maybe they will finally do something about it for you try to rest up i know its hard with working and being in pain its hard to find somewhere to sit lie but please look after yourself big(((HUG)))) take care fingers crossed for tomorro for you
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: val h :-)

Subject: Re: packing

thanks shaz feel much better having got some sleep the good thing about working in the afternoon is u can stay in bed lol not doing much as quite a few joints still complaining still. have got to go shop and put some money on my phone as got to message jill bless her.i do not know how she keeps such a positive attitude i only have things mild and from time to time it gets to me lol
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: jill

Subject: Re: packing

Val dont U go worrrying bout me ok (((xx))) u just worry bout U ok....dont get credit just to txt me lol, u stay home ok x he refused to go to skool today, told m,e to get lost, Pratt, and then callled me an idiot!!lovely huh? especially as on thurs he promised me he wld go Mon(fri was INSET day) gave him back ALL his privledges on the strengh of him going to skool today, the little sod refused to go to bed and was up past 11, causing havoc, my eldest screaming at him to go to bed as she has work in the morning...feel so bad for her.... and yet he is still a sod, and wont go to skool..... that is almost ten months hes has offf, inclusing most of year 6!! Im A prisoner in my own home.... i cant go out whilst hes here, its illegal.... but i do have to leave him when I do the skool run..... truly had enuff..... have CPN coming here tues.... also childrens services r coming here on home visit...and also Have to attend a Panel meeting with all the authorities...Welfare education officer and the like.... showed son the letter...he replied, dont care!!! no point going to skool then...reason I showed him the letter is, he has got to go too!!! ...was trying to show him How serious this has all become....!! he just does not care!!! God Give me strength!!
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: Nora

Subject: Re: packing

Jill - sorry you're having such a hard time with your boy.Why don't you show him pictures of all the lovely things - cars/girls/holidays he can have if he studies hard and then some of tramps and losers who bunked school and flunked exams and didn't get the best jobs. Worth a try? I know there is no magic solution. Sending positive vibes. XNora
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: jill

Subject: Re: packing

Nora thank you so much for that lovely replie to me....... Nora hes a gorjus looking boy and has a sweet heart, when he gets his own way....I cannot say No, or he goes ballistic..... in his quite times, i talk to him about all those things U mentioned.... his Uncle is very rich...Vice president for walkers crisps....which he got threw hard work and Uni..... they live in a mansion and hav e iut all.... Ive told my son, that happened only thru hard work at school....during hes nice times, he agrees with me....tellls me all I need to hear, and nxt morning hes like a demon rising from his duvet..... jeckyl and hyde....terrrible..... hes under childrens mental health for \Anger courses, but he is refusing to go there to get the help!!......anyway Nora thanks for your Positivity, i will carry on fighting the fight.... love him to bits at the end of the day, but im so scared for his future, thank god I live out in the countryside, or he wld be hanging out with all the badduns!!! thk again....how r u anyway Nora? xx
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: Sas

Subject: Re: packing

OMG Jill I didn't realise your son was that young. So has he just started high school? A friend of mine had a very similar experience about 2 years ago her Son same age as my eldest was in Year 9. He did GCSE's just did OK but is now in College and loves it!!! There is hope I am sure ((((hug))) Has he got friends that could talk to him?? That was probably a stupid thing to suggest I am sure you have tried everything.
Take care hun x
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: Sas

Subject: Re: packing

Val Hope you got your packing done and your visit to the hospital was ok?

Take Care (((hugs))) x
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: Sas

Subject: Re: packing

What do you mean you can't go out while he is home Jill?
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: Della

Subject: Re: packing

Hi Val sos sorry you are not good u make sure u take it easy. How did the hospital go??
(((((sending big hugs to u))))))) x
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: jill

Subject: Re: packing

SAs hes 11...legally not allowed to leave him, whilst he doesnt bother going to school ive told him he has lost all privledges...xbox, tv in his room(cos hes on it until 12 clock at night) then tired and wont get up, so taken that away, no TV with us down stairs, until returns to school...was told by doc that all that im doing is reasonable, im usually placid and let them get away with stuff....... now im hard on him, but then he abuses me, verbally clling me retard, idiot, pratt, commit suicide, go die etc etc etc...daily, all beco ive taking his privledges away...... he tells me hes going bk to skool say on a fri for m onday, give him bk everything, come M onday he wont go!!!...im a mug!!!hes not been in school since year 6 jan 2009....a teacher called hima prick! excuse langueage...big disiplinary, no misconduct found as no witnesss....... I beleive it happeend, this teacher is a moron....... anway, thort when he starts big skool, it wld all be ok....but it hasnt been, hes scared....the school have been amazzzzing, been under the care of the Cluster of Excelllence...its an agency that works in the school for kids that r scared etc, now he wont even go there..... he hasnt yet been into a classroom, and its the 5th week of secondary school...hes making it harder for himself...at the begining everyone was scared, all in same boat....but now they will all be ok, and he still isnt.... ive not got a meeting with all the authorities about his absense, all he says is " dont care, im not going"!! and he means it, he wont go.......but in betweeen, hes abusing me with bad words, and goads me...he refuses to leave the front room, and my other kids r getting upset...its terrrrrible..... ive got childresn services coming to seee him on 19th oct, might bring it 4ward.... home visit..... ive had enuff sas.... hes been a pain since 4 years old! always been aggressive and gobby.... wont listen to anyone...yet a star pupil in his old school....but abuses everyone at home!!! thows things down stairs at us, taken 3 dooors off his bedroom, smashed windows ijn this house, its rented and cost us 1000.00 a month to live here!! we have replaced all his damage except the last dooor, which was recent and hes taken offf the wood around the dorrr from pulling the dooor offf its hinges....at night he becomes a nightowl and causes problems and the rest of us cant sleep, becos thes banging thru anger....... when hes gr8, hes gr8, but I cant handle him anymore, my other two boys and 2 girls cant cope either!!I also have two boys with Aspergers syndrome(autism) they cant take Chaos)...anyeay, i will get thru it....but ive told him this is so serious now, after this meeting, its the courts!!!he has always had a terrrible temper, and now hes getting older, its got worse!! he just told me Sas, that if he HURTS himself, hes going to blame it on me!!!! I do NOT hit my kids!! hes manipulative...hes also got an appointment with the psychatrists Nurse for Anger managment, hes refusing to go....trying to get them to do home visits is a joke!!! anyway...alll will get sorted one way or another..... I cant do any more, im a loving Mum, adore all my kids, and hes going to end up in foster care at this rate, becos hes upsetting all the family, my 23 year old is becoming depressed, and cant afford to move out just yet..... she hates him....... he is a handful...and im worrry about his future,,,,,hes a control freak and cant stand the word No!! thing is, I dont say NO that often..... but he see going to bed as a Punsihment, always has! for years he had given us crap becos its Bedtime! ive had it.......anyway soz to ramble on offf topic........ but hes goona be the death of me!

Im a prisoner because its illegal to leave a kid under 13 in your home alone, asked about this, and been told that is a fact!! if summat was to happen bad, I wld be held responsible, just like the fact im been taking to a panel of Childrens services as to Y he hasnt Not attended!! thing is....I have NO IDEA Y, other than that hes worried.....but wernt they all worried when they all began! ? life is shi* soz guys x ps, cant even have my Spine OP all becos of my son!! it wld Kill me offf!
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: val h :-)

Subject: Re: packing

jill (((big hug))) for u get some one else to look after him while u go out u need space from him or u will go mad wish we could be there for u .
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: Nora

Subject: Re: packing

Jill - Just remember - you're doing your best with a very difficult situation plus having to cope with illness. You deserve a medal. Keep telling all the 'professionals' you need support and extra help. They must be able to rush him into CBT Therapy or something of the sort. Can't they give you extra help so you can have your op? I really hope you get some help with him. However difficult they are, we love them aye?
Good Luck with it. XNora
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: Sas

Subject: Re: packing

Jill I don't know what to say I have read your post with tears in my eyes what a nightmare for you all cannot imagine dealing with all that and being in pain...as a said before you are a star (((hug))) I realised he must be about 11 as you said yr 6 there is actually no legal age limit for leaving a child on their own unless you consider him to be at risk. Have you taken him to the GP's? and maybe got him started on Ritalin? Sorry if you have done all this just tell me to mind my own business LOL
Take care x
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Date: 05.10.2009
From: val h :-)

Subject: Re: packing

sas he wont go she is in a very difficult situation he to big to make go places and they will not come to him so jill makes her self ill worrying about it all she needs help big time there must be some but never been in her position so do not know what is avalable for her think it time his dad had him for a while to give her and the other kids a rest from all the stress
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Date: 06.10.2009
From: Jill

Subject: Re: packing

Val U r there for me...trust me u r....thanks for ya support, love ya lots....

Sas Im sorry, didnt want u gettin g upset, im so sorry xx My gp is amazing, he has done all in his power, i.e. psychriatric help, Like Val said, son wont go! ! hes has an appt for Anger management on 28 oct, he wont go...Ive Begged them this morning to get them here to talk with him...the psychiatrist is ring ing me back, but my fella is here and he is going to deal with the call..... also we have the panel meeting with authoritiies on 16th(im looking forward to it, not worried as I have all my evidence stacked Up against My own child) terrrilbe huh? but he told ne He is not going, and he wont, rang the Ed welfare AGAIN today, to chat with him and tell his this..... Ive also got another appointment (home visit luckily) but time is on skool run, guess what I found out....the man that is coming from Childrens services(GP got the involved) is a STUDENT!!!! Omg i said please dont send a student.... she replied, we r understaffed, and hes nearly qualified..... No wonder social services end up with kids being hurt or other family memembers huring each other! its a joke....... but on a Positive Note guys, cos I have Been so very wrong to bring this into the forum, I want to aplogise for causing u extra worry, Im ok... but for those that dont know me, may not understand my reason for bringing this in here, so apologies to them, but thanks to U Nora, Sas(love that name) and Val, for listening and Helping me beleive in myself......I am a fab mum, but what broke my heart last night was my son Jack who has Aspergers(mild autisim) was so close to tears last night and told me he has no break and no where to go to get away from his brother! that hurt bad.......the sad thing about all of this is, My son refuses to go to school and is n ow in a worse place than b4, when they all began secondary school....... my back is crap and I even forgot my Important appt to give spine surgeon my ansa as to have the Op this year or not...... Im not..... there is NO help Sas regards anyone helping me during the Op recovery period, which for me will be harder than most as I have Reiters disease, that means the soft tissues take forver to mend(surgeon said that will be my biggest problem, recovery will be long, my last op in 2003 took me 8 months to be able to get out and swim to help my back....so yea im worried about all that, with this all going on.......but today, my CPN is coming at one, will ask her what she can do, as she is a gateway to everything....so heres Hoping...... Love ya all Jill xxx


Val hope all went fab for u today xx


PS I never ever lay a finger on my kids, ive always used reasoning, works with the others, sadly doesnt for my child that wont go skool.....I had a fab upbringing, i was one of the lucky ones, didnt have much in life, but we had massive love from our parents, I have sooo much love in my heart for my kids, think thast y im going Nuts with all this, and Y he is so Obnoxious.... he didnt go to bed until 12 clock last nite!! im shattered!
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Date: 06.10.2009
From: welshwitch

Subject: Re: packing

Val I wasn't critising Jill far from it I am obviously new to this forum and didn't know this history of Jill and her Son.

Jill I hope you don't think I was critising you as a Mum as I said sorry if you had already done all this - sometimes another person's view helps
and I did ask you to tell me to mind my own business which I think Val has done.

Take Care x
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Date: 06.10.2009
From: jo

Subject: Re: packing

jill, love and hugs, I think you are brill how you deal with everything, Good luck for 1pm, love jo
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Date: 06.10.2009
From: jill

Subject: Re: packing

Awwww Sas , love ya name sweeetie....no honestly its cool, U havnt said anything to offend anyone, Nor did Val, Val was just giving u the some history of my prob, that is all....she wasnt saying Mind ya own LOL....go read it again Sas....U have beeen so helpful to me, your point of view was important to me, and encouraged me a lot.....your input in here is gr8, as Vals is too....just go bk, and re read her reply, she truly was just informing u of the prob I had, as I wasnt on when the posts came thru, LOL Plus Val doesnt use Punctuation much(soz val lol. U do make me Smile) and often we can misread a posting if the Punctuation is misssing.....anyway both of U, thanks for ya support and lufffs ua both for it..... Im here for u, if ya need me xxxxxxx
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Date: 06.10.2009
From: jill

Subject: Re: packing

Jo thanks, very kind of u to say something so lovely, honestly, thanks very much... hiw r u coping Jo? where r u at with Meds etc?

Love Jill xx
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Date: 06.10.2009
From: jill

Subject: Re: packing

Jo my CPN that came, (I sound like a Nut, im not honest) well ok, mb jsut a bit lol....anywa she is also a complimentary Therapist....its funny Jo cos I dont know if U remember, but a goood few months back, a NUT came into our cosy forum, and began Preaching to everyone,and accused us all of being sorry for ourselves, and telling us OFF cos we didnt eat Organic fooods etc...... but he mentioned EFT....its a Tapping process with a mantra U must use....sounds Nuts, but guesss wot, she offered taht today with me, I tried it, and it was amazing...it helps re alighn the bodys energy....becos neg emotional thoughts etc can cause disruption in the bodys energy system(www.emofree.com) to do with the Meridian line that we have running thru our bodies, goes out of Sync etc......complicated I know....but it the feeling after was like having a Reflexology massage.....so relaxed after! anyway, goona give it a go....cant preach about it like crazy Wayno, lol cos I dont know enuff, will c how it goes....I will except any support I can get at the mo...life here is a tad stressful LOLOL.....hope ya ok xx
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Date: 06.10.2009
From: val h :-)

Subject: Re: packing

hi girl so how do u do it where do u tap??? if it works that good and we would have listened if the person u talked about had explained and let us make up our own minds about it
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Date: 06.10.2009
From: jill

Subject: Re: packing

lol Val...god knows, just i had an expert showing it to me for over hour and half....the way that twat explained it was awful.... will c how it goes Val....thing is, ive been stressed since she went, kid wound me up....guess im just open to anything at the mo..... Val tell us what happened..... how r u feeeling??? u ok??
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Date: 06.10.2009
From: jill

Subject: Re: packing

Val U were in here when Wayno the nitwit, was attacking everyone.... that was y no one took him seriously, he attacked me and was terrible to Della....dont U remember ? he did explain, but was awful if none of us agreed with him, or if we challeneged him and asekd for more info on it, he blew his stack!....U clda listented to him, never said that U shldnt......I seem to remember u sying to him that U wld look into it....did u?..........anyway, wannnna know how u r, and how u got on today
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Date: 06.10.2009
From: jill

Subject: Re: packing

Val I just re read your posting to me,

regards my post I sent to Jo and mentioned my session with therapist re tapping and EFT etc, becos she wished me goood luck etc, so i was polite and told her my experience today but re reading your post....U seem angry with me for some reason ? r u? if yes.....errrr y? If No, then I Misunderstoood your post, but it sure seeems like it.....it was my first sesssion, she clda done reflexology and i would have been just as relaxed, because it wld have been a foot massage, which also relax people. same with Yoga....result wld have been same, except I cant do Yoga, she could have stuck me in a Hyrotherapy Pool, and the result would also have been the same ....it isnt a Miracle cure! once does not exist...its a case of recharging batteries, so to speak!...... If ive Mis read your post to be something else, id like an explaination all the same, cos seems to me that u r annoyed, and that ive cheated u out of some kind of technique ? confused now
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Date: 06.10.2009
From: val h :-)

Subject: Re: packing

hi he did not explain as much as lecture long and hard never got to the end of them lol sorry i am not mad with u sorry if it came accross as if i was do not always use right words luv u loads and anything which helps any of us is good was interested as will try anything to see if it worked will have to go back and see what i wrote. sorry sorry sorry sorry would never be mad with u my pal just not got head on straight today
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Date: 06.10.2009
From: val h :-)

Subject: Re: packing

u r right did not put that very well have taken my foot out of my mouth . what i ment was if it good we all want to know as u know we all looking for something that will help. and we would have listened to whayno if he had not been preaching to us . sorry if i made it sound as if i was not taking it serious i take anything that might help very serious from diet to exercise will try them all.
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Date: 07.10.2009
From: Della

Subject: Re: packing

Opps Val lol how did u manage to get ya foot right up there hehe sorry bad joke. hi girls glad it went ok Val for you its nerve racking the first time ay ive got hospital on friday see what happens ill let u know.Hi Jill hun so so sorry u are suffering kids can be so hurtful ive had my fair share but as u say we get through it dont we because we love them so much.i hope things get better for u. On the subject of EFT the tapping as i said when silly wayne was here i had heard of it and seen it done before he even came in here, as a lot of therapist use it for panic attacks which u all know i suffer with. I have tryed it but feel a bit silly doing it but jill if u say it does relax u i may well try again.anyway i'm gonna try go to sleep as its 2am and im in real pain (cant sleep) anyway take care everyone xx
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Date: 07.10.2009
From: val h :-)

Subject: Re: packing

della harder to get it out again lol. poor u hope u got some sleep and today a bit better for u we need to know more about this eft but no long threads please as loose the plot half way through do not know why as can read a book for hours got to go dishes want washing and got to go to town managed to kill my ironing board yesterday lol
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Date: 07.10.2009
From: jill

Subject: Re: packing

Val its ok ya dafty......but i guess we r both fragile at the mo, thanks so much for your text, appprecited that, honest, didnt txt bk, cos it was late when i read it, i turn my mob off at nite, but read it later when i use my mib as a torch to read by!.....all is ok....I promise.....no need to say sorry, just wanted to know if I upset ya....glad I hadnt.....so im sorry u thort I thort that I was upset, and I was upset that u thort I was beoing Orrible lololol....anyway all is goood cos i lufffs ya morre! xx
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Date: 07.10.2009
From: jill

Subject: Re: packing

Hi Della, im so sorry ya still suffering so bad....remember when nu first came in here beggging us for answers, I thought U might get over the bout of swelling, but to think its far worse....u seee now, we r all different and we can never come out with definate answers, thats Y its so hard for Docs to Diagnose us..... regards EFT.... I fel silly doing around my fella, so I wont.... its also one of those things, that when u have to do it, ya think , poo gotta go do it, bit like when we use to do our exercise...I always thort poo, gotta go gym etc, but it always felt better once we done it....I felt brill after she did it.... it does make sense, but its something that needs to be done daily! bore lolol..... anyway, Try and rest, thing is NOT to sleep during day, just cat nap, as that can and does affect out sleep patterns so badly....take care Della, and I hope ya family and grandbabies r all well xx
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Date: 07.10.2009
From: Della

Subject: Re: packing

Hi val and Jill thanks for the message feeling a bit better today had a lie in lol.Anyway its pouring wiv rain here miserable and cold but i'm having a relaxing day dont feel like making an effort so im not going to lol sat in my jim jams can't be bothered to get dressed lol. Anyway take care all hope everyones not to bad xx
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Date: 07.10.2009
From: val h :-)

Subject: Re: packing

della good girl taking it easy will do u the world of good on those bad days hope tomorrow a good one as well
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Date: 08.10.2009
From: jo

Subject: Re: packing

hey Jill, glad it went well the other day. Not heard of eft, but sounds good, hve to look into. up for anything that helps.
wrist been playing me up, they are getting weaker.
Hope everyone is well and not to achey with the weather, luv Jo
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