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Date: 14.02.2014
From: Rachael

Subject: Silly question - BUT how do you lower standards.

I've always been house pride (not like a show home) but now there are so many things I b can't do as I need know they will cause me pain during & afterwards.

Hubby has said I need to get past the house not be to my standards & friends/company should understand that as
A: I can't do it due to pain & discomfort
B: He can't do it all due to him working long hours
C: We can't the girls to do to much as they are still children and have lots of homework.

I 100% agree with him but can't get my head round what people will think of they comes to visit.
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Date: 14.02.2014
From: bsk

Subject: Re: Silly question - BUT how do you lower standards.

Get a cleaner Rachael.
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Date: 14.02.2014
From: Rachael

Subject: Re: Silly question - BUT how do you lower standards.

Can't really afford one bs otherwise I would.
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Date: 14.02.2014
From: rhona

Subject: Re: Silly question - BUT how do you lower standards.

They should be coming to see you Rachael and not the house and people should understand. If they don't like it then you don't want them anyway. I will say though, I don't think it would do your children any harm to help a little, even just putting things away for you. x
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Date: 14.02.2014
From: Rachael

Subject: Re: Silly question - BUT how do you lower standards.

Thanks Rhona. The children do help, they do the dishwasher, vac um, dust, help with the animals, the eldest (14) is a fabulous cook for her age and they change their own needing etc. I think they do enough at min BUT if I'm having a particularly bad day, I come down and they've completely gutted and tidied the kitchen and tidied the living room. X
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Date: 15.02.2014
From: willis

Subject: Re: Silly question - BUT how do you lower standards.

hi rachael
well sometimes you have no choice but to lower your standards! and it's not about that, it's about accepting that your body doesn't let you have the choice! there is a little poem thing i've seen on facebook and, well its' true. can't remember it all but the one bit i remind myself of when i look about the house is.... the dust will still be there tomorrow!
and, as long as i am still here the dust can be too ;)
It's good your daughters help, it shows they understand their mums condition, and frustration at it all.
so if you insist on doing some housework - a little bit a day is just fine.
As Rhona says, people coming to see you are coming to see YOU not your house and if they don't like it well it's their problem and their loss.
you have a good day
ps you could always just spray a bit polish before visitors come round then they'll think you've just tidied and maybe just missed a bit lol
xx
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Date: 22.02.2014
From: chris

Subject: Re: Silly question - BUT how do you lower standards.

Hi Rachael,
the benefit 'pip' is for things like this to allow you to afford a cleaner. It's not related to any income, anyone can apply for it.
I finally admitted i needed help myself after years of badgering by friends and applied in October. They must be overwhealmed in their office because i still havn't heard back - although on a phone call i learnt they are still processing it.
best of luck to you,
chris
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Date: 24.02.2014
From: Eve

Subject: Re: Silly question - BUT how do you lower standards.

I have a lot of stress about this as well and really need to get a cleaner and, hopefully soon, move to somewhere all on one level if possible. I find low lighting helps haha, you can't see the dust so much!

It is their problem if they have issues with your house but then I know it doesn't help how you feel.

People rarely come to mine, I tend to go out to meet people though I rarely do that now as evenings and weekends are for resting. It takes some of the pressure off.

You can get cleaners who come in and do a blitz clean as well as ones who do general cleaning and some will do additional chores such as ironing. Not that I ever iron anything mind but I could use help with things like changing bedding, folding sheets (fitted sheets are my nemesis!) etc... I've seen some who do bits of shopping and other general housekeeping too.

Maybe make a list and get some quotes, just breaking it down and having an action plan may make it seem less overwhelming (she says, really needing to take her own advice! :)).
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