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Date: 20.11.2013
From: Nic

Subject: Isolated at work

Hi all,
Just wondering if anyone else feels a bit isolated at work, and if so if there's anything you've done to help overcome it. I guess I just feel that no one really understands how I feel, and that people think I'm making excuses or being lazy. Is that MY problem, and I need to get over worrying what other people think of me? Comments like "yeah my joints get a bit achy this time of year" or "yeah my gran has that" not many people ask if you're ok and if they do I normally keep it really brief and just say not too bad thanks, because I guess they don't really want to know! I have good family & close friends, but just finding work isolating & a bit lonely, finding myself not joining in and keeping myself to myself. I'm a teaching assistant in a large primary school. Thanks in advance for any advice or your stories.
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Date: 20.11.2013
From: laura

Subject: Re: Isolated at work

I know exactly how you feel infact most people at my work make rude remarks. im the only one where I work that has it so no one else understands some are kind but that's it im actually under a company called graft who support me with employment issues and the person I see has fibro herself infact this person has taught me everything I know about fibro . I understand how you feel take care
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Date: 20.11.2013
From: marlene

Subject: Re: Isolated at work

Hi there, just like to say sorry to hear you are not being treated very nice by your work mates.
It is very hard for people to understand the issues with any type of arthritis. I have OA and have learned so much from this forum about many other types of arthritis.
Have you ever thought of getting some leaflets and leaving them on a table in the staff room? You may be surprised how people will react when they have some understanding.
I am now 62yrs and have had OA since my 30s and have had surgeries. So many people say to me well we all have aches and pains at your age. Well what about when I was 30. I just ignore it yes it used to make me angry but not any more. It is their problem if they have no understanding and why would they? to be fair.
Nic try not to isolate yourself and try to explain why you may need a bit of help and why you can't always do what they do. The people you work with are educated people and a little more education from you would not go amiss. I hope this helps you and keep your chin up and don't let them get you down.
Laura when people are rude about your illness that says a lot about them. Get those leaflets leave them lying around!!!

Good Luck take care x
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Date: 20.11.2013
From: laura

Subject: Re: Isolated at work

hi marlene yes you are quite right the funny thing is im a carer lol but yes maybe time to get leaflets out
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Date: 20.11.2013
From: Denise

Subject: Re: Isolated at work

The trouble is to the uninitiated the word arthritis comes under one umbrella ... yep the odd aches and pains in most people's eyes. I had an interesting conversation with my hairdresser today where I explained the difference between RA and OA. She's an intelligent person but had no idea. We need there to be more education and to be honest, I would probably have been just as 'green' if I hadn't been battling RA.
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Date: 21.11.2013
From: Emm

Subject: Re: Isolated at work

Hello Nic,
I, like Marlene developed RA at an early age, but in my mid twenties.
I can identify with what you are all saying. I worked until I was 58 and only found one nasty girl, who was actually disabled herself and should have had more sense.
I find even family will go on to the subject of their more minor aches and pains when I mention my own plight. Maybe this is just human nature! I don't know but I do think it is harder when you are younger, you just want to fit in and not be different.
I think this is the attitude I had and earlier in my life I was prone to thinking, probably naively, that I may get better!

I think working is good for us though, if you can get on a comfortable footing with your workmates. i think it takes our minds off the illness a bit.
Sometimes I wish I was still at work!

Good luck with Nic x
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Date: 10.12.2013
From: Nicola

Subject: Re: Isolated at work

Thank you so much for all your helpful comments. Just knowing that I've got people here that understand helps so much! X
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Date: 07.01.2014
From: Rachael

Subject: Re: Isolated at work

There is one other person where I work who has arthritis in the spine, who continuously tells me hers is far worse than mine, and because SHE doesn't go to clinic the neither will I as I'm so much younger. Also if she can do things so can I..

Fast forward 5 months, I'm off work, I wear constant splints, I have appts every week and I am going to clinic.

Just shows you, appearance & age etc can be deceptive.

I really can empathise with you Nic.
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