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Date: 29.07.2012
From: Laura

Subject: No idea what to do

I have no idea what to do things were starting to look more positive but as usual everything goes wrong . My parents told me this morning that if I'm going to be on benefits then they can't afford to keep me at home there probably isn't any point in me renting a room cos there will be a time when I can't afford it I understand where they are coming from in a way but I can't help but feel a bit rejected I mean don't they think I have enough to go through mum says I'm making her I'll
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Date: 29.07.2012
From: marlene

Subject: Re: No idea what to do

Oh Dear Laura, so sorry for you. Have you talked with your parents. They are more than likely overwhelmed to think you are ill.
Try to talk as a family and tell them how you feel. Let them know you need the support from them.
I do hope all comes good for you.
Take Care xx
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Date: 29.07.2012
From: bsk

Subject: Re: No idea what to do

Hi Laura, I'm sorry too. That is a tough situation to find yourself in.
Why do they think they can't afford to keep you at home? As Marlene says, talk to them about needing support and maybe discuss why your mother what you could do to help her cope better with your situation. Does she have any support herself I wonder?

What about your GP - could you talk to them to see if they could explain to your parents how difficult things are for you?

Do you get DLA? If not, that might give you a bit of extra money you can pay your way with.

Apologies if you've tried all these options already.
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Date: 29.07.2012
From: Laura

Subject: Re: No idea what to do

Hi my mum thinks I'm lying about it makes me feel like its my fault there have been a couple of incidents where we have argued and she has said to my face that she thinks I'm faking she has then promptly come over and has apologised saying that she was nasty and didn't mean it but she does otherwise it wouldn't keep happening . My futture is ruined my career is in tatters in front of my eyes and she isn't helping me at all I fell destroyed utterly destroyed I hate fibro its ruined my life I'm currently not on dal but am going to claim my mother says I won't get it I have spoken to gp who basically told me this is as good as its going to get maybe he is right I don't have the energy to fight no more
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Date: 29.07.2012
From: bsk

Subject: Re: No idea what to do

Hi Laura, I think it is really difficult for people to understand these types of illnesses. My family don't really get that some days I'm worse than others. My friends don't understand how vulnerable I am to viruses and colds as on anti tnfs. I am ill a lot of the time but some days I feel ok. I think it confuses people. Also, as Marlene said, maybe your mother doesn't want to think you are ill so by denying it she is hoping it isn't true.

What about going to CAB or other advice centre to see if you can get support to apply for DLA? If you get it, maybe your mother will then understand that you have such difficulty.

Try and keep positive.
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Date: 29.07.2012
From: marlene

Subject: Re: No idea what to do

Hi Laura,i rather think your mum may be in denial about it all. I would imagine it would be very hard to except one of your children no matter what age are sick.
As bsk suggested go to CAB and ask them what help you can get.
Have you ever asked your mum to go to the GP with you, maybe this would help to have your gp explain to her exactly what is what with you.
Wish you luck chin up and take care xx
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Date: 30.07.2012
From: Colin W

Subject: Re: No idea what to do

hi Laura , how long you had fibromyalgia , my son is similar to you , had it since he was 12 & now 29 .

we were first told he was depressed , kid realy into computers & computer games in PCworld & got to sit down because of the pain is not depressed & told them so

would still recommened you get second opinion , CFS is very similar & some think its the same condition , he seen the local CFS expert & said it was FM

one thing he does suffer with Hypothyroidism & takes Levothyroxine , think it would be worth you getting your Thyroid Gland checked

I can understand where you & your parents are coming from , there are places where you can get advice like CAB , strange if you was homeless you would get all the help you need but to sign on or claim incapacity while at home will get totaly harassed by DWP

hope you get some help soon
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