Date: 26.07.2011
From: carl
|
Subject: Fed up with r.a
Hi all. I just wanted a quick moan. I have RA and have alot of mobility most of the time, but as you know can be quite disabled and in pain quite out of the blue. My immediate managers don`t understand the condition and are not wise enough or prepared enough to listen to me. If I have 3 days or less off work I don`t get paid, and benefits system does not cover time off work because most of the time I am an able-bodied person. I think my friends just hear blah blah blah as soon as I mention anything to do with how i`m feeling (which i only mention as i might be a bit unsociable and don`t want them to think i`m being off with them). Just fed up because we can`t seem to win.
Moan over. Sorry
|
Date: 26.07.2011
From: davina
|
Subject: Re: Fed up with r.a
hi carl i'm sorry your having a bad time of it, i also know how you feel and i have lost a few friends cause i couldn't keep up with the socializing that i did before ra come along. i lost my job this yr too so horrible but on the plus been given benefits but still don't cover the mortgage, oh well i just wanted to say hi and that your not alone. xx
|
Date: 26.07.2011
From: carl
|
Subject: Re: Fed up with r.a
Hi davina, just wanted to say thanks for listening. I`m really sorry about your situation and I hope things work out for you on the job front soon. Remember you`re not alone either and maybe someone on the forum can offer some advice. thanks again xx
|
Date: 27.07.2011
From: Dilizjo
|
Subject: Re: Fed up with r.a
Hi Carl, I can empathise with you regarding being fed up with RA I feel the same way it affects us all in every aspect of our lives, whether we are feeling pain or not. As for your bosses I would take information into them and demand that they read it and the Disability Equality act, it is not just the mobility that affects our ability to work it is the fatigue and for some the adverse side effects of the medication we take. It may be an idea to go to your GP and ask to be signed off unfit for work when you get your next flare up then you will be able to claim ESA, which I know isn't a lot but it will open other benefits such as housing and council tax, also look into DLA, even though you are mobile most of the time, this benefit is there to help whether you are in work or not, but please bear in mind that when you fill out the forms you fill them out as if it is a really bad flare up day, if you go to CAB or Welfare rights they will help you do that, you will get refused on application but keep at it. As for your friends well I can't comment on them except that they need to realise that maybe one day they will walk in your shoes and will need emotional support and to be honest it will be you they will turn to for it. I am lucky in the respect that the people that are closest to me understand my condition and are very supportive, but people that I consider just aquaintences hear the word Arthritis and assume that it is a copable condition and are a little less understanding:(
Anyway less of my droning on, I must get boring at times but as said above you definitely are not alone.
Take care xx
|
Date: 27.07.2011
From: carl
|
Subject: Re: Fed up with r.a
Thanks dilizjo, you`ve given me lots to work on. I`ll definately look into everything you`ve told me.
Also, if thats droning on, lets have more of it because it`s really helpful and definately not boring. Thanks
|
Date: 27.07.2011
From: marlene
|
Subject: Re: Fed up with r.a
Carl, just a quick message, it is very hard for people to understand what people go through each day with the awful effects of RA. I have OA and have had elbow and spinal surgery with more surgery to come. When i first came on to the site i knew very little about RA but i am well educated now. I have even read posts referring to OA as old peoples arthritis. well mine began at 35 hardly old, it is just what people say when they are having a bad day i know. I am now sixty a young sixty i am proud to say and i have learnt to live with the constant pain. As Dilizjo said a good network of friends and family is important and you do find a few fall away from you but dont let this worry you, true freinds will always be there. When i feel fed up angry or really happy i share with the forum. LOL. I hope this helps and take care you will get there in the end like all of us, glad your venting on here rather than kicking the dog (joke) my dog is my saviour some days.
|
